This horrendous “Melons” commercial for something called “542 542” is on all the time lately and it fills me with rage! I want to shake this fool by his stupid beige-plaid shoulders. Texting “How can I tell my girlfriend’s bra size?” to 542-542 isn’t going to help. Look at one of her bras, you flaming idiot! Maybe I should text him that. It’s the only way to get through to the kids these days. I hate technology! Keep reading this blog!