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'Melrose Place': Through a promo, darkly

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There isn’t a soul on the face of God’s green goodness more excited for the revival of Melrose Place than I am, so I was pretty cheesed for this new promo. Keep your eyes peeled for the Gossip Girl font in full force!

Thoughts: The chintzy weird arches built into the walls of the apartments are intact, which brings me a strange kind of joy, and a mere glimpse of the 4616 address makes me giddy. But man, for a show set in sunny California, does this show ever look dark. Yes, the original had murder, intrigue, drugs, prostitution, cults, explosions, attempted lobotomies, gun violence, suicide, molestation, and so forth, but this just seems sinister and secretive in a way the original really wasn’t. That doofy contrast of earnest, sweet young thing and outlandish, bizarre soapiness is what made Melrose really tick for me: How does thoughtful, nice Jane Mancini get herself in such weird situations? Oh, Allison the naive, is there nothing you can’t poison with your intense neediness? Even moody Jake and sultry Jo were verifiable good people. But in these promos, the ostensible nice kids are still coming across as brooding and dangerous, as if everyone has tapped in to his or her inner Amanda Woodward.

That said, holy moly, Laura Leighton looks fan-freakin’-tastic! I have missed you, Sydney.

What do you think, PopWatchers? Are you looking forward to the Melrose reboot, and have you come up with a catchier nickname than Melrose (re)Place, which is what I came up with?