Not sure if you guys know this about me but I’m a pretty big deal down in Chihuahua, Mexico. Wes is gone, Wes is gone. There are so many classic Wes moments and lines in this episode that I hardly know where to begin. Things obviously deteriorated pretty fast this week between Wes and Jillian and I know it was pretty obvious who was going home by the time we got to the rose ceremony, but it didn’t matter because you knew Wes’ ego wouldn’t allow him to go quietly into that Spanish night. You just couldn’t take your eyes off this Texas-sized dumpster fire.
The week started with Jillian meeting Kiptyn in Madrid. After watching Jill and Kiptyn do their own version of dancing with the stars we know this: Kiptyn can’t really dance and he’s circumcised. Geez, how tight were those pants? Everything is going smooth with Kip. One thing that seems to worry Jilli a little is that right now Kip doesn’t seem all that enthused about proposing at the end of this and she is definitely looking for that. It’s not a deal breaker by any means but as she said, it’s an issue that will have to be addressed. After Kip, Jillian happened to run into Matthew Perry in Spain…wait. That’s not Chandler, that’s Reid. We learned on this date that Reid is large (Soy grande). I think Jillian and Reid’s relationship has been fun to watch grow. They seem to complement and challenge each other well. Their relationship may have started slowly but over the last few weeks it has really picked up steam. Out of all the guys, Reid seems to be having the toughest time handling the fact that Jillian is dating other men at the same time. That’s always tough for the guys and their egos. I did find it amusing when Jill asked Reid what he found hard about the fact that she’s dating three other guys. What could he possibly have a problem with when he knows his girl friend will be making out with another man in about 12 hours? Bottom line though is Chandler…Reid is looming grande right now in Jillian’s corazon (bet ya didn’t think I knew French now, did ya).
After her day with Reid, Jillian was anxious to spend some much needed time with Ed. She took a huge leap inviting him back and really wanted to see if she made the right decision. About five minutes into their date you could tell they were going to pick up right where they left off in Canada. The chemistry between the two of them is undeniable. The one thing that was different about Ed’s date was that Jillian accepted the fantasy suite card…kind of. With the other guys she emphatically turned down the fantasy suite, but with Ed she really wanted to use it to make up for lost time (clothes on!). You guys wouldn’t believe the time it takes me to write those cards and then mail them to Spain. I’m thinking next season we go green and I’ll just text them the fantasy suite option.
So, after Ed it was time to go and confront Wes. Let me start this off by giving you my true feelings as well as Jillian’s side of the story — something I really couldn’t fully do until he was gone. Wes represented the kind of guy Jillian thought she would end up with when she came on this show. Because of that she really went the extra mile in giving him opportunities to prove himself. Contrary to what some of you might think, Jillian wasn’t blind to all of Wes’ antics. Yes, a lot of it she wasn’t privy to, but obviously more than one guy told her what Wes was up to. I also think a big part of why she kept Wes so long was she was protecting him. Jillian cared about this guy and knew he’d been screwed over a lot in his life and right or wrong she didn’t want to be another person to just walk away from him. Although I don’t tell Jillian everything that goes on, we did have several heart-to-heart talks about all these guys on and off camera. She defended him a bit and I think the more people attacked Wes the more she wanted to prove them wrong. I know many of you wish she’d kicked him to the curb weeks ago but this was something she needed to figure out and handle in her own way and in her own time. Sure she could have done it sooner but the point is she did dump him and I think she handled herself well. Jillian truly believes Wes came on this show to promote himself and in the end she feels a little sorry for him.
Alright, enough of the serious stuff. Let’s talk about my favorite Wes moments this week. This is a line every man should tell a woman whose heart he is trying to win: “I’m gonna be true to myself…numero uno is most important here.” I really don’t know why Jillian didn’t drop to one knee and propose to him right then and there. Probably my favorite moment was after a really awkward moment, the fantasy suite card arrives. Now obviously the day has been just a bit less than romantic so when presented with the option to spend the night with her, Wes says…wait for it… “ummm, I think we should.” Survey says…snowball’s chance in hell!
The rose ceremony reminded me of watching Sesame Street as a kid; which one of these is not like the others (go ahead, sing it out loud). Three guys in sharp dark suits, and then there’s Wes. Just so you were positive this train was coming off the tracks he adds this little gem: telling the guys that if he’s the one going home “you know I’ll be back home havin’ lots of sex.” Reid’s expression to this comment was fantastic. After Jillian finally dismisses Wes, he jumps in the limo and gives us one of the best exit meltdowns in the show’s history. After throwing out more tired Texas sayings like “I’s born at night but not last night” (Dr Phil even thinks Wes throws out too many corny Texas sayings), Wes actually comes up with what I believe is the start of the perfect country and western song (my apologies to Mr. David Allan Coe) “I’m in Spain…everybody’s gonna know my name.”
Wes is gone and now it’s time for Jillian to get down to business. We’re now all heading off to Hawaii for the remaining two weeks of the show. I heard from several of you that I wasn’t specific enough about the remaining schedule. My apologies, here it is. Next week Jillian takes the three remaining men on exotic dates in Maui. She’ll narrow it down to the final two. The following Monday will be the “Men Tell All” special. I can’t remember a time when I was more excited to host this show. So much to deal with that I’m going to need an extra couple hours from ABC. The week after the “MTA” special we’ll have a two-night finale. The final episode will air on Monday, July 27. Tuesday night we’ll wrap it all up with an “After The Final Rose” special. Hope that clears it up for you. Now “I’m goin’ back home, I got my dog waitin’, and I’m pushin’ my new single.” Did I mention I’m huge in Chihuahua?