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Hugh Jackman auctions off Tim Tams, his favorite thing to put in his tum tum

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Hughjackmanchest_l

Hughjackmanchest_lAs of today, Hugh Jackman is auctioning off the last box of Tim Tam cookies in the U.S. Not many people seem to care…yet. (Highest bid since 2 p.m. is still $202.50.) Interested parties have until May 14 to contribute to charity and/or a rare self-induced case of diabetes. Act now!

These cookies look almost illegally amazing and not just because they’re glowing from within the hypothetical muscle-bound darkness of Hugh Jackman’s body cavity. How have I missed them being sold here? I’m still pretty sure I’ve experienced Tim Tams but have no idea where or when. I either ate them out of a vending machine in a London Tube station or, like…in bed, as an 8-year-old…or I just think I’ve eaten them because I’m able to approximate their exact taste based on the packaging. Seriously, no idea. The homepage of “Australia’s Favorite Cookie” features an infuriating cocktail napkin that asks, “Do you miss them or MISS them?” You toy with me so! I don’t know, Pepperidge Farm. I know not what I miss. Maybe you should PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE CONTINUE TO SELL THESE DELIGHTS IN THE U.S.

Have you eaten Tim Tams, P-Dubs? Please describe them in great detail below.

This PopWatch post has been brought to you by a fleeting hope that someone at Pepperidge Farm will read it, think “How nice of them to get the word out; they must be hungry,” and send us a box of Tim Tams. Not a “package.” A box.

addCredit(“Carlos Costa/PacificCoastNews.com”)