Man, some days, it’s hard to be a geek. It’s tough being the dude who cares about this stuff even if he doesn’t want to. It’s a calling, really — like pulling a sword from a stone or being handed one of the Lantern Corps rings — and you can’t turn it down. You have to watch the season finale of Heroes, even if you’ve sorta stopped caring. To save you some time, here’s the episode, and after the jump, the four spoilery things you “need” to know:
1) Claire is now furniture. The poor girl went from being the focalpoint of an entire network (“Save the cheerleader, save NBC”) to,literally, being pushed around by Sylar like an ottoman. She went from vital to annoying to scenery.
2) Angela Petrelli knows how to howl. When that thing that happens at the end of the episode — you remember, Sylar killing Nathan — and Angela finds the body, she lets loose this cry of anguish that was, maybe, the most convincing thing all season.
3) That last twist was pretty good. With her son dead, Angela coaxes Parkman into mind-wiping Sylar so the shapeshifter believes that he’s Nathan Petrelli. And no one knows but Angela, Parkman, and Noah. And “Nathan” — the wolf who doesn’t even know he’s in sheep’s clothing — has a thing for clocks. (In a little nod to Watchmen, the last thing we see Nathan do is change the time to 11:55.) Not bad, Heroes, not bad.
4) We’ll never see heroes fighting again. So we get to the pivotal moment of the episode — when Nathan and Peter make amends just in time to team up and take on Sylar — and the brothers storm into a hotel suite, ready to face off with electro-fisted Sylar. The doors close, and we’re outside the room with Furniture Claire, and all we see of the fight is blue flashes reflected in Claire’s eyes. Seriously? You’ve got a show with characters who can fly and throw fire and do all kinds of crazy-awesome comic-book stuff…and you don’t show us the climactic clash of the titans? Battlestar Galactica, for it’s occasional devolution into talking pseudo-religious pabulum, knew that the audience needed the space battles and shootouts; knew that after so much plot buildup, we needed that explosive release. Does Heroes just not know how to do action? What’s a budget for, if not to blow it in the season finale? Why tune into a show that steadfastly refuses to give you what you want? I’ll say it: Heroes is a tease.
How about you? Will you tune in for Volume Five, “Redemption,” next season, or are you done? Do you wish they put Heroes out to pasture and committed to Chuck?