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Friday the 13th: The new trailer, or Horror's Greatest Hits!

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Over the last dozen or so years, there’s been the ironic winking horror of the Scream series, the Japanese horror of The Ring and The Grudge, and the torture-porn horror of Saw and Hostel. All of these trends have more or less played themselves out (even though they keep cranking out Saw movies like so much hamburger meat through the grinder, to ever diminishing returns, but I digress). The one trend that hasn’t lost steam, however, is the horror remake, at least judging from the newest trailer for the newest horror franchise to (yes, I’m going to do it) rise from the grave: Friday the 13th.

Check it out and then let’s talk after the jump, cool?

There’s something almost quaint about this trailer, in that it rather unironically hits all the classic horror movie sweet spots. There’s the eerie introductory voice-over (a clip, of course, from the original 1980 Friday the 13th, when the big bad wasn’t Jason, but his bat-turd crazy mother); the pretty young people innocently partying at one of their (absent) parents’ lakeside cabin; the nubile blonde, treading water in the lake, realizing the spooky hulk in the hockey mask is carrying a machete; the creepy old woman intoning that said blonde “ain’t missing…[ominous pause, cut to black]…she’s dead”; the other blonde terrified to pull the shower curtain back, only to reveal Jason is standing right behind her!!!! You get the idea. By the time the trailer begins literally counting the number of deaths, cutting away right before the money shot, it seems like it’s telling audiences “we know what you want in a horror film, and we’re going to pack it all into one giant über-horror film, and we’re not even going to pretend that practically any of this cast lives to see the final reel because we know you couldn’t care less about that.” What’s interesting is this feels less cynical than just plain honest about what we expect out of our slasher flicks.

What do you think, PopWatchers. Are there any horror movie cliches missing from this trailer that you’d like to see, or are happy are missing? Will you be in line come Friday, Feb. 13 (happy almost-Valentine’s Day!), or will you just rent the original and watch it at home? And when was the last time you “partied” at your friend’s parents’ lakeside cabin by twirling in short shorts clutching an open bottle of wine?

More on horror:
Michael Bay talks about the Friday the 13th remake
Gallery: William Friedkin on 13 Must-See Horror Movies
Stephen King: Why Hollywood can’t do horror

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