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Emmys 2017
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Article

Sound Bites: The week's best TV quotes

TV’s funniest lines from July 18-24

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”In Atlanta, the highway department is getting rid of signs that say ‘Men at Work’ because they’re politically incorrect. The new signs say ‘Men and Women-Who-Look-Like-Men at Work.”’
—Conan O’Brien on Late Night

”I’m not a bartender. I’m a creator of cocktails. I’m a chef for alcoholics.”
—Memphis, a self-described ”mixologist,” on Big Brother 10

”Maybe you had a seizure.”
—Jewel, to contestant Sophie, who was caught rolling her eyes at the judges’ comments, on Nashville Star

”Well, I wouldn’t kick her out of bed, but I’ve secretly preferred Mary Ann to Ginger.”
—Tom Decker (Grant Show), after his wife suggests they hit on a pretty redhead across an airport concourse, on Swingtown

”I wanna stab you, you’re so gorgeous.”
—Judge Mia Michaels, to contestant Chelsie Hightower, on So You Think You Can Dance

For daily video recaps of all the best Sound Bites, go to ew.com/soundbites

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