Those Charmin bears have been the bane of my existence for ages, wiping their backsides with abandon in plain view of the cameras, shaking their tailfeathers against trees like exotic dancers working the pole of a low-rent strip club. To make matters worse, Charmin has taken to using a deeply disturbing visual — the “sullied hand” graphic — to show their bathroom tissue is stronger and more absorbent than its leading competitors. “Best for bear bottoms?” Heinous!
Not to be outdone, competitor Cottonelle is running a new ad where a puppy roams the streets commenting on the dubious conditions of various human hind ends, while a voiceover declares “the world can be tough on bottoms.” (Seriously?) The clip ends with said canine finding sweet relief on a beanbag, while a Cottonelle package appears on the right of the screen, showing the pooch’s pooper swathed in Cottonelle’s comforting T.P.
I know none of you are going to try to tell me you love these ads, so the better question is, which do you loathe more? Vote now!