He’s a paste-eating 8-year-old who makes such proclamations as ”When I grow up, I want to be a principal or a caterpillar!” And after watching the residents of Springfield cast their votes for Ralph Wiggum in a presidential primary on the Jan. 6 episode of The Simpsons, EW is also throwing its support behind the intriguing write-in candidate. (It should be noted our first choice, Stephen Colbert, has dropped out.) Oh, Ralph may not seem like the face of the future, but look beyond what you think you know about him. (Or, for that matter, the fact that the U.S. Constitution forbids anyone under 35 from being president.) This is a man who understands the rigors of the job. (He was George Washington in the school play.) Who has triumphed over adversity. (He’s had ringworm.) Who is stained with candy instead of scandal. (His idea of profanity: ”Mitten!”) Ralph Wiggum, we choo-choo-choose you to lead us into a new era of change, so you can help us create an America that’s a little less…hurty.