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Emmys 2017
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'Good Luck Chuck' vs. 'The Heartbreak Kid': Whoever wins, we lose

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Bendane_lI thought the ads for Dane Cook’s latest “comedy,” Good Luck Chuck, looked sorta familiar when they started appearing recently — and now I know why. Variety reminds me that Good Luck Chuck‘s prominent tagline (“Sometimes love blows”) is almost identical to the one currently being used by Ben Stiller’s new one, The Heartbreak Kid (“Love blows”). Plagiarism alert!

Just kidding. Variety chalks the similarity up to sheer coincidence, and I have no doubt they’re right. These taglines are too dumb to be worth stealing — and that points to a more fundamental truth about both of these movies. Namely, they both look absolutely awful! Judging by their trailers, Chuck is about a guy (Cook, at right) who discovers that every woman he has sex with ends up ditching him and meeting her soulmate immediately afterward due to some sort of unholy curse (?), while Heartbreak follows a dude (Stiller, left) who marries an apparently awesome lady only to realize that she’s actually a shrill harpy who’s nowhere nearly as hot as this other woman he meets on their honeymoon. In a way, they’re showing two inverse sides of the thickheaded premise which their taglines so eloquently express: Casual promiscuity and serious relationships alike cause major headaches for fun-loving bros, primarily because both ways of life require dealing with those craaaaaaazy women. How charming. Maybe if the films’ producers spent more time coming up with original comedy scenarios, they wouldn’t run into these problems with their billboard copy…

But please, feel free to stick up for either one of these apparent laugh-free zones if you think I’m wrong! Responses in the form of well-worn two-word aphorisms preferred though not required.