So, while everyone else is buzzing about Britney’s less-than-stellar VMA performance, Chris and I were wondering what everyone thought about Sarah Silverman’s monologue. In the spirit of our subject, we couldn’t help but get a little controversial….
Chris: So, what’d you think of Sarah Silverman’s VMA monologue!?!?
Bethonie: Who is this? Are you God’s black friend?
Chris: In a way.
Chris: I am God’s gift.
Bethonie: To whom?
Chris: The Internet.
Bethonie: Watch your mouth!
Chris: Did you watch Sarah’s mouth? That was mad gross.
Bethonie: Oh yeah, the sideways shtick…
Chris: She distended her lips to resemble Britney’s box
Bethonie: That was “disgrossting,” to quote Paige from Degrassi.
Chris: Yeah I REALLY didn’t like that. It made me uncomfortable.
Bethonie: You know I love Silverman. Love her! But I think she went a bit toofar.
Chris: Yeah I love her too, especially when she is racist.
Bethonie: I mean Britney’s kids. Come on?!
Chris: Britney said that herself, according to various news sources that I frequent.
addCredit(“Sarah Silverman: John Shearer/WireImage.com”)
Bethonie: US Weekly = news source?
Chris: What do you think the “US” stands for? It is thenational news.
Bethonie: Underground Salaciousness.
Chris: That’s a big word…like “trampoline.” You must write for PopWatch. But anyways, her stuffabout 50 and Kanye was pretty funny. Her diarrhea joke was just lazy and not as”cute” as I think she’d hoped. I really don’t think celeb roasting isher forte.
Bethonie: Yeah. She’s been watching too much Cookie Party, I think. Although…..
I’m kinda tired. Maybe if I use Silverman’s line… I canleave early, no harm, no foul.
Chris: I’ve seen you running to the bathroommad times.
Bethonie: So I have an ally in my excuse!
Chris: Her show is funny because she’s offensive to everyone and her”character” doesn’t even realize or care, but singling out individuals makes her seem more mean.
Bethonie: Yeah, it’s better when she just generalizes about whole groups ofpeople. Who doesn’t love a good racial joke?
Chris: Sho ‘Nuff. Making blanket statements about race is always hilarious.
Bethonie: Also, I think the way she said “orifices” was really funny.
Chris: The notion of her talking to Cee-Lo is also funny to me. That would be an amazing conversation
Bethonie: Actually, I think she should sit down with all of Goodie Mob. Perhapsshe could bring them together once more.
Chris: Indeed, that would be insanely fresh.
Bethonie: I love how it says Update: Commenting is temporarily unavailableon Sarah’s website under her monologue. How political!
Chris: I heard she dresses in blackface for the new season of The SarahSilverman Program, so that should really win back anyone she offended.
Bethonie: Oh dear. I’d have to call Spike if she did that.
Chris: No, she’s on Comedy Central.
Bethonie: I meant Spike Lee, silly goose.
Chris: I thought you meant Spike TV, home of the Video Game Awards. Arguablybetter than the VMAs.
Chris: Since the whole ceremony was so “experimental,” having afaux host do an opening monologue was basically a waste of time.
Bethonie: Don’t you think the laughter is kind of uncomfortable when Sarah saysthat Cee-lo was really Kanye West?
Chris: Diddy has a funny expression. He seems confused then amused. 50 wasreally loving it — He was just happy she mentioned him and not ‘Ye.
Bethonie: Guess we know which album Silverman will be purchasing on Tuesday.
Chris: She really just cracked that tough facade and brought out 50’s innerjoy. What a wonderful moment. But then she did talk about Kanye, thus ruininghis night.
Bethonie: 50 will get over it. See! She CAN reunite Goodie Mob. We HAVE to gether on the phone
Chris: If I called her, it would be to holler, not to reunite a rap group.And since she already got jiggy with God… my chances are pretty, pretty good.
Bethonie: Don’t you abide by that rule of honor — that you don’t get jiggy withyour friend’s exes? I’mappalled. And think God would be too, quite frankly.
Chris: Yeah I guess so, since it’s a “commandment” or whatever.
Bethonie: so what’s our verdict?
Chris: At the end of the day, Sarah Silverman put about as much effort intoher monolgue as Britney did into her performance.
Bethonie: I agree. Silverman should stick to her show (and perhaps a career inreuniting ill rap groups)
Chris: Agreed. Within the scheme of one of the most boring shows ever, shewas still a highlight for me. The only other parts I liked were when theyshowed Walerapping and the beginning of
Chris Brown’s performance — now there’s a young manwho I’ve really change my mind about!?
Bethonie: Love Chris Brown!
Chris I am gonna go play a computer game that will take up my whole screen.Bye!