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Spider-Man! The Musical!

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I know, you never thought you’d hear the words “Spider-Man,” “U2” and “Broadway musical” in the same sentence (heck, the same paragraph), but I won’t be among the scoffers who’ll insist that a Spidey stage show, with tunes by Bono and the Edge, is doomed to flail like Doc Ock’s tentacles. For one thing, the songwriters seem to have some already-apt tunes, like “Vertigo” and “The Fly.” And for the rest, the could modify some of their hits just a little, with results that might look like the lyrics below. After the jump, there’s a music video, so you can sing these lyrics along with Bono over U2’s original version.

Once I shared a kiss with MJ in the rain
I hung upside-down; why, I can’t explain
She still digs me as a bug, loves me as a man
Why I’m running away, I still don’t understand

Man
I’m slippery
I’m sliding down
I walk on walls like they’re the ground

It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
I move on mysterious webs
It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
I move on mysterious webs

Harry takes a dive bomb at me because he’s mad
Dude, I’m sorry that I had to kill your dad
Your grief is for real, I know how you feel
Since I let my uncle die, I sure feel like a heel
(On my knees, boy)

Poor Aunt May
So meek and mild
Yet she still treats me like a child

It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
I move on mysterious webs
It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
I move on mysterious webs
It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
Hide by day, hunt bad guys by night

And now my suit
Is turning black
I don’t know why
Is it from space?
Is it a virus?
Now with Sandman and Venom
I don’t need this tsuris

It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
I move on mysterious webs
It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
I move on mysterious webs
It’s all right, it’s all right, all right
Hide by day, hunt bad guys by night…

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