“I’m gonna out Kevin Costner right now,” Dane Cook told PopWatch earlier this week. “He’s one of the funniest people I’ve ever been around.”If you’re wondering why the standup king has been around Costner, it’s because they costar in the June 1 serial-killer thriller Mr. Brooks. Costner (pictured, in character) plays a businessman who murderscouples at the urging of his imaginary friend (William Hurt); Cook plays a peeping Tom who coincidentally snaps pictures of thelovebirds at the moment of their demise, then blackmailsBrooks into teaching him the killer craft. While we’re still digesting the deliciousness of Costner playing a psychopathic serial killer, Cook is already thinking of Costner’s next potential unexpected turn: the comic role he’s writing for him.
The film, set up at the Weinstein Company, is called Ex-Family. “The basic premise is a guy falls in love with a girl. Her whole family ends up falling in love with him. He gets cold feet, breaks up with the girl, and instead of just her becoming the crazy ex, the whole family makes his life miserable because they all want him back,” Cook says. “If Costner will play her father…”Before you play Armchair Agent and tell us whether you think Costner should take Cook up on the offer, hear the comic out.
“[Here’s] a story that I love to tell my friends,” Cook begins. “Thefirst time I ever felt comfortable enough to bust his balls, we werefilming this scene all night in a car with William Hurt. We weretalking about conspiracy theories or something and all really gettin’into this conversation, and then suddenly [Costner] brought up themovie The Postman and went on this eight-minute epic story.William and I are just listening for five, six, seven, eight minutes.’The Postman does this and dadada.’ He finally got to the endof the story — ‘And that’s why that happened…’ — and I just took abeat and then went, ‘When does that come out?’ [Laughs] Hisreaction was like just what you would want. The first thing he said was[shouts] ‘You motherf—er!’ And then he was just laughing so hard. Allnight long, he just kept jabbing me: ‘I can cut you out of this movie,man.’ But he was so cool to accept it, and so funny, that I was like,’Man, I’ve always been a fan, but I really want to see you domore like you’re doing now…’ I told him I’d write something with himin mind because he’s a funny cat and people need to see it. Now I knowhow his humor is, so I’ve got my fingers crossed.”
One more thing Cook hopes Costner’s future holds: A hosting gig on Saturday Night Live. “I told him, ‘It’s a crying shame you’ve never done SNL.’He won’t do it. I don’t know if it’s fear so much as he’s like, ‘I justdon’t know if they’ll write the right characters.’ But on set, he’llact out voices and become different people. ‘This guy one time…’ He’ssuch a laidback guy, but very, very, very funny.”
What do you say, PopWatchers? Assuming the script is better than Rumor Has It…, we’re sold.