Overheard in the parking lot of a Hollywood-area Whole Foods — or was it one of my daydreams? Whichever — you’ve all gone home for the weekend anyway, haven’t you?
Rob: The Tiffster!
Tiffani: How many times have I asked you not to call me that?
Rob: Sheesh! Touchy much?
Tiffani: Sex-tape much?
Rob: So did you hear Brothers & Sisters is extending my role as a Republican senator for the rest of the season, except that I’ll be listed as a “special guest star.”
Tiffani: Fancy! And I just got a recurring role as a “sexy, manipulative, and shrewd businesswoman” on What About Brian.
Rob: Well, that sounds… um… sexy!
Tiffani: Go ahead, you can say it.
Tiffani: No, I won’t be offended.
Rob: Okay, dude, What About Brian totally blows. Why would you hop aboard that sinking ship?
Tiffani: Well, there’s this little thing. I call it my mortgage.
Rob: Oh, hey, I hear you.
Tiffani: I mean, can you pay my automobills?
Tiffani: Yeah, didn’t think so. And as my agent always says, if you’re gonna take a job for a paycheck, might as well be on a show nobody’s watching.
Rob: Hey, no need to explain. Remember Dr. Vegas on CBS?
Tiffani: What a steaming pile of crap that was! Of course, not as bad as my Fox series Freeway.
Rob: Wasn’t it called Fastlane?
addCredit(“Rob Lowe: Ron Tom; Tiffani Thiessen: Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic.com”)
Rob: Well, I liked that show. Or at least the part where you made out with Jaime Pressly.
Tiffani: Perv! You better get in touch with your inner feminist. Brothers & Sisters is all about the ladies.
Rob: You think?
Tiffani:Are you kidding? Working with that Sally Field-Rachel Griffiths-CalistaFlockhart troika is gonna be like swimming in Lake Estrogen.
Rob: That makes me feel funny.
Tiffani: I’m just sayin’
Rob: Dang! I hadn’t thought about that. How am I gonna get anywhere with this gig?
Tiffani: Use the hypnotic power of your piercing blue eyes!
Rob: H-h-how? How did you know about that?
Tiffani: Because I have that power, too, Rob. I HAVE THAT POWER, TOO!
Tiffani: LOOK INTO MY EYES!
Rob: Holy crap, Tiff! They’re… mesmerizing! I… I… Can I pay your automobills?
Tiffani: Nah, that’s okay, Rob. Just get me a guest spot on your show after mine finally gets canceled.
Rob: [Robotically] I will get you a guest spot on my show after yours finally gets canceled.
Tiffani: Good boy. See you around.