Scott Brown’s Hit List
1 Lance Bass reportedly breaks up with boyfriend ”Bass gotta swim, baby,” Bass reportedly said. ”Bass gotta swim.”
2 Kathy Griffin has scare in small-plane mishap At the last second, the small plane decided she was not famous enough to die in a small plane.
3 Tori Spelling to publish memoir It will be illustrated by Richard Scarry.
4 Cameron Diaz says nose job is medical necessity She’s at the top of the nose-donor list — and hoping Owen Wilson isn’t in a car accident.
5 Al Sharpton’s wardrobe wins raves in the New York Post This has sent Jesse Jackson experimenting wildly with velour.
6 Paul McCartney reportedly has seen a psychiatrist Apparently, the problems run deep — all the way back to ‘Ram,’ which the shrink calls ”musically confused.”
7 Michael Richards will meet with targets of racially charged rant He plans to meet every black person in America individually and perform a ”special” pratfall for each.
8 George Clooney mourns the loss of pet pig Max After a short, private tribute, Clooney emerged from his kitchen and remembered Max as ”delectable.”
9 Yellow Wiggle replaced Sammy Hagar is thrilled to be working again.
10 Clooney responsible for DeVito’s drunken View spot One by one, he’s neutralizing his ”Sexiest Man” competition.