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Borat: Get ready for the knockoffs

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Borat, as thousands of syntactically garbled, definite article-dropping headlines have informed you, is for make big hit for Hollywood — high five! And you know what that means: Six thousand Borat-esque knockoffs over the next few years. Leave it to Hollywood to transform near-Sellersian satire into shtick. (Thank you, Borat, for saying nyet to a sequel.)

Comics of Sacha Baron Cohen’s caliber don’t grow on trees, so look for a steep downturn in quality. When a new kind of comedy comes on the scene (There’s Something About Mary, for example), the suits tend to pick up on its broader gags (bodily fluids, ethnic blackface/mustache-face, gotcha-style prankumentary) and feed them into the mass-production line. But they almost always miss the nuances, the craftsmanship, the heart and, thus, the appeal. So what can we expect in the way of ersatz Borat?

(See Scott’s nightmare Borat knockoffs after the jump.)

The Vladimir Putin Show
The Russian leader tours America, learning about the culture, spoutinghilarious misspeaks (“Kill that man”), and getting into funny scrapeswith locals and then imprisoning them.

Kyrgyzstan Karl: Funny Accent Man Go Utah!
In this snuff comedy, Pauly Shore, wearing a fake mustache, is beatento death outside a Provo Denny’s. At one point, he breaks character andprotests, “Wait! I’m really Pauly Shore!” This only intensifies theassault.

Murph, The Retired 19th-century Irish Stereotype
Yes, Boy-o, Murph gets into a donnybrook or two as he drinks andrailsplits his way across the nation, dodging teetotalers, temperanceadvocates and contraceptives. Along the way, he throws back the curtainon the Whigs’ anti-Catholic, nativist streak.

Dingy: Three-inch Pilgrim
Little Dingy’s only three inches tall, but he’s got an awfully bigdream: To walk across America, interviewing people! A Wayans Brothersproduction.