Hello? 911? Yes, hi there, I’d like to report a robbery. No, it’s not in progress, but I’ve got it all on tape. They televised it on Bravo, during last night’s season finale of Project Runway. What’s that? You didn’t see it? Well let me give you the scoop. The final two was a showdown between Uli Herzner (pictured, left) and Jeffrey Sebelia. Now mind you, I wasn’t Uli’s biggest fan going into Olympus Fashion Week. I’d even argued a month ago for a Michael-Laura-Jeffrey final three, due to Uli’s previous lack of versatility. But from her opening salvo (that brown zebra number with the detailed neckline) to the glimmering silver shirt dress (with sleeves!) to the insanely hot yellow bikini, Uli rocked the final runway. And her last look, that triumphant jade halter dress with a slit up to Northern Canada, yowza! As Heidi said, every woman in America would wear an Uli.
On the flip side, we had Jeffrey. Putting aside his consistent misogyny — and yes, tossing around terms like “frigid” and “feminazi” qualifies him in my book — and the way he kept flashing his armpits on the runway, how about the fact that half of his final collection was hideous? Like the wildly unflattering blue minidress that made his model look five months pregnant. Or that grim black dress with something grey tied over it. I even disliked the much discussed green and white zipper dress. All it needed was a couple of cords and Marilinda could’ve hung it in her kitchen window to keep out the sun. So yes, please head to Bravo HQ, and put Michael Kors, Heidi Klum, Fern Mallis, and as much as it pains me, even the bewitching Nina Garcia, on the paddywagon. We’ll let a jury of their PopWatch peers decide their guilt or innocence.
What say you all? Did Uli have the superior collection, or was Jeffrey the better overall designer?
addCredit(“Ulrike: Bravo; Model: Barbara Nitke”)