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Today in Baby Mamas: Anna Nicole, Reese, and Tina

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94436__reese_lHello. This is your Baby Mama Round-up for today, September 27, 2006. We kick off this morning’s top stories with the news that Anna Nicole Smith’s lawyer, Howard K. Stern, is now claiming to be the father of her newborn daughter.  And that is the sum total of words we will waste on this ongoing and increasingly bizarre/tragic chain of events.

In other unfortunate pregnancy news, Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon are reportedly signing on as the leads in Rendition, a new spy thriller from Tsotsi director Gavin Hood. According to Variety, Gyllenhaal will play a CIA operative, and Witherspoon (pictured) will play, naturally, the pregnant wife. See below, ”Angelina Jolie/automatic weapons.” I am currently writing Mr. and Mrs. Smith 2: The Ladies Are Getting Restless in my head; send ideas. This recent trend of noirish dramas about those halcyon days when men were men and women stared adoringly at them in soft focus has to go out of style at some point, right? Right?

addCredit(“Reese Witherspoon: Darren: INFGoff”)

Let’s wrap up today’s Knocked-Up News on a happy note! Former Weekend Update partners Tina Fey and Amy Poehler will reunite sometime in the near future, reports Variety, to film a movie called Baby Mama, about a career woman who decides to have a child via a surrogate. I didn’t look real hard for more details, but I’d say the smart money is on Fey as career woman and Poehler as surrogate, because if it were the other way around it would just be silly.

And that’s it for Today in Baby Mamas! Tune in tomorrow, as Britney Spears gets one day closer to announcing she’s pregnant again!