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Emmys 2017
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Kevin Federline is the next Vanilla Ice

Kevin Federline is the next Vanilla Ice — Mr. Britney Spears joins a long line of bad white rappers

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Congratulations, Mr. Federline! You’ve been inducted into the Cred-less White Boy Hall of Fame. Now take your place next to V. Ice.

Kevin Federline
K. Fed debuted his new single, ”Lose Control,” at the Teen Choice Awards on Aug. 20. The teens chose ”no.”

Vanilla Ice
The ultimate white-rapper punchline. Which was worse, his hair or his rhymes? Discuss.

Jeremy Jordan
Jordan was looking for the ”Right Kind of Love,” but should have looked for the right kind of fashion stylist.

Joey Lawrence
Blossom’s bro added edge to ”Nothin’ My Love Can’t Fix”; too bad it sounded as awkward as Mayim Bialik’s name.

”Informer” was incoherent aside from ”A licky boom boom down.” Luckily, drivel needs no translation.