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Emmys 2017
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The poetry of 'American Idol' judge Randy Jackson

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154541__randy_lRecently, PopWatch treated you to an item about the pure poetry of Paula Abdul‘s American Idol critiques. But — yo, yo, yo, dawg — it wouldn’t really be fair to judge Randy Jackson if we didn’t point out that his contestant evaluations are pretty elegiac, too, at least when directly transcribed into verse form. Here’s a sampling of R. Dawg’s works from Tuesday night’s performance show, complete with PopWatch-approved titles:

But how did you really feel about Chris Daughtry?
Yo, yo.
Yo, yo.
Amazing, amazing.
Loved the jacket.
Loved you.

This is how you start a positive review of Elliott Yamin?
Yo, baby, Elliott
So check it out, dawg
So check it out, man
I hated
Check it out
Did not like the arrangement

Mixed messages for Paris Bennett
I thought it was pretty good
I mean, I’m not saying I was blown away
But I liked it
I wasn’t over-the-top about it
But I liked it

Confusion and Taylor Hicks
Yo, Taylor, man
I don’t know what’s goin’ on, man
I don’t know if it’s me tonight or whatever
But dude, that was completely the wrong song
For me
For you
I didn’t get it
It wasn’t half as good as the original
It felt like weird karaoke to me
I don’t know what’s happenin’ here
I don’t know what’s goin’ on here

addCredit(“Randy Jackson: Ray Mickshaw/WireImage.com”)