December 23, 2005 at 05:00 AM EST

Stallone Resurrects Rocky OCT. 17
Sylvester Stallone, 59, announces he will write, direct, and star in a sixth Rocky movie, then later in the month commits to Rambo IV. He’s waiting until he turns 140 for a Judge Dredd 2, because by then the last person who saw Judge Dredd will be dead and can’t warn everybody.

Craig Named The New Bond OCT. 14
Sony announces its latest James Bond: Layer Cake‘s Daniel Craig, who’ll star in the franchise’s 21st flick, Casino Royale. The movie, which starts filming in January, will focus on Bond’s early days, showing how he became the superslick spy we’ve known and loved for 43 years. Perhaps we’ll also learn of the traumatic swizzle-stick experience that forever turned him against stirred martinis.

Stern’s Successors Revealed OCT. 25
Infinity Broadcasting announces that Adam Carolla and David Lee Roth will split Howard Stern’s time slot on most stations (Carolla in the West, Roth in the East) — after the King of All Media departs in December for his new kingdom in satellite radio. The energetic Diamond Dave will have to adjust to this new gig, mostly because after sitting in a vinyl chair for four hours each day, he risks an awful case of buttless-chap rash.

iPod Joins the A/V Club OCT. 12
Apple CEO Steve Jobs unveils a new iPod, which plays video on its 2.5-inch screen. To entice customers, iTunes lets users pay to download music videos and ABC hits like Lost. And now we all come one step closer to having liquid Wife Swap injected into our cerebral cortexes.

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