An All-Star Salute to Patti LaBelle: Live From Atlantis
Tuesday, Nov. 8, 9-10 p.m. (UPN)
Gathered in that giant Bahamas hotel where Bobby and Whitney vacationed in Being Bobby Brown, Nelly, Kelly Rowland, Ashanti, Michael McDonald, Boyz II Men (aren’t they Men II Middle-Aged Guyz by now?), Mario, Gerald Levert, and Yolanda Adams will perform the hits of Patti LaBelle. The honoree will reunite with Sarah Dash and Nona Hendryx, her partners in the vocal group Labelle, to perform their hit ”Lady Marmalade,” which should be like buttah.
The 39th Annual CMA Awards
Tuesday, Nov. 15, 8-11 p.m. (CBS)
Duet till you’re satisfied! The performances at the Country Music Association’s yearly prize party will include such unusual pairings as Willie Nelson and Paul Simon, Jon Bon Jovi and Sugarland frontwoman Jennifer Nettles, and Elton John and Dolly Parton.
Tuesday, Nov. 15, 8-10 p.m. (UPN)
Fight fans, be forewarned: The violent incident at this awards show last year was edited out for broadcast. You’ll have to settle for performances by Ciara, Ludacris, Pharrell, Young Jeezy, and Keyshia Cole; plus, David Banner, Paul Wall, and Lil Wayne will appear in a tribute to victims of Hurricane Katrina. Mary J. Blige will receive the 2005 VLegend Award, given for vlifetime achievement.
I Walk the Line: A Night for Johnny Cash
Wednesday, Nov. 16, 8-9 p.m. (CBS)
Two days before the release of the Johnny Cash biopic Walk the Line (weird coincidence, that), U2, Sheryl Crow, the Foo Fighters, Shooter Jennings and Jessi Colter, Norah Jones, Kid Rock, Alison Krauss, Kris Kristofferson, Jerry Lee Lewis, Martina McBride, Brad Paisley, and Dwight Yoakam will perform the music of the late country icon. Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon, the stars of the movie (what are the odds?), will introduce the performances, as well as video clips of Cash performing and scenes from the movie (this is getting freaky; it’s almost like they’re deliberately promoting the film!).
2005 American Music Awards
Tuesday, Nov. 22, 8-11 p.m. (ABC)
Country singer Keith Urban, urban singer Keith Country (just kidding!), Hilary Duff, Lindsay Lohan, Sheryl Crow, Tim McGraw, Mariah Carey, Rob Thomas, and the Rolling Stones will perform during the event, which picks winners based on votes by record buyers (as opposed to shoplifters and illegal downloaders). Wait. These are the American Music Awards. What are foreigners like Keith Urban and the Stones doing here?
Kenny Chesney: Somewhere in the Sun
Wednesday, Nov. 23, 8-9 p.m. (ABC)
At Thanksgiving, we should remember the less fortunate, so let’s all tune in to show support to the newly single country star.
Faith Hill: Fireflies
Wednesday, Nov. 23, 9-10 p.m. (NBC)
But let’s not forget the preternaturally fortunate either.
OTHER SPECIALS, MADE-FOR-TV MOVIES, AND MINISERIES
Category 7: The End of the World
Sunday, Nov. 6, and Sunday, Nov. 13, 9-11 p.m. (CBS)
In this sequel to last year’s hit miniseries Category 6, Randy Quaid, Tom Skerritt, Shannen Doherty, and lots of other famous actors play people confronting the worst storm in history as it threatens to wipe out civilization, as well as Washington, D.C. (Gulf Coast residents, don’t worry: This is fiction. Hurricanes don’t go higher than category 5.)
Penn & Teller: Off the Deep End
Sunday, Nov. 13, 7-9 p.m. (NBC)
Traveling to various tropical locations, the duo will perform water-based magic tricks that will leave Teller speechless; then loudmouth Penn will divulge how they did it.
Saturday Night Live in the ’80s: Lost and Found
Sunday, Nov. 13, 9-11 p.m. (NBC)
Cast members and guest hosts tell behind-the-scenes stories of how the weekend institution went from its worst season to some of its best. Yeah, that’s the ticket!
The Poseidon Adventure
Sunday, Nov. 20, 8-11 p.m. (NBC)
Remade with a terrorist angle to preclude any possible escapist fun, this disaster film stars, among others, Steve Gutenberg, Bryan Brown, Rutger Hauer, Peter Weller, and C. Thomas Howell. It’s two treats in one: a suspense thriller and a ”Where are they now?” special.