Whitney Pastorek
July 01, 2005 AT 04:00 AM EDT

To help us judge the pack of nubile young women, um, interacting with vehicles on TV at the moment, we called in an expert. Ms. Tawny Kitaen — who did splits across the hoods of two Jags in the video for Whitesnake’s 1987 fist pumper ”Here I Go Again” — grades the current car chicks (with the help of her 12-year-old daughter, Wynter).

PARIS HILTON
CARL’S JR. COMMERCIAL

TAWNY: We loved the bathing suit; the foam was a bit much. I mean, look at Angelina Jolie. She could get me to eat 10 hamburgers just by asking me to. WYNTER: It’s a little too gratuitous. C

JESSICA SIMPSON
”THESE BOOTS ARE MADE FOR WALKIN”’ VIDEO

WYNTER: Hated it. She’s trying too hard. TAWNY: You’re embarrassed for her. I saw the car part and said, ”What the hell is that for?” It makes no sense. D+

LINDSAY LOHAN
”FIRST” VIDEO

TAWNY: We liked Lindsay a lot. She’s never looked better. I thought she was very sexy without pushing it at all. This has completely changed my outlook on her. I’m shocked. A

CIARA
”OH” VIDEO

TAWNY: Do I want my 12-year-old watching that? No. WYNTER: Would it bother you? It’s not like I’m going to go try and do that stuff on top of Dad’s car right now. B+

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