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TV's funniest quotes for the week of June 11, 2004

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”Our President fell off of his bike, and today declared war on gravity.” CRAIG KILBORN, ABOUT REPORTS THAT BUSH GOT SCRAPED UP AFTER TAKING A SPILL, ON THE LATE SHOW

”Yesterday New York’s Governor Pataki proposed a new commission that’d oversee all gambling in New York, including lotteries, horse racing, and casinos. Not surprisingly, the new commission will be called the Mafia.” CONAN O’BRIEN ON LATE NIGHT

”I don’t know how these things work. I guess she asked for a raise.” THE SOPRANOS’ STEVEN VAN ZANDT, ON ADRIANA’S (DREA DE MATTEO) MURDER, ON BEST WEEK EVER