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The Punisher

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The Punisher

Let’s be clear: 1989’s The Punisher (R, 92 mins., Lions Gate), starring Dolph Lundgren, is not a good movie. It’s amateurishly shot, horribly acted, and barely written. But it’s still preferable to the flaccid Tom Jane dud that’s now in theaters (and shares all those traits). Why? Because Lundgren kills a lot of people and doesn’t waste time doing it. What audiences want from a film called The Punisher is a high body count, not forced family bonding and facially placid villains. So leave your slippers on, kick back, and wistfully remember a time when someone named Dolph could be a movie star.