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Sound Bites

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”Shannen Doherty has signed on to produce and act in a new sitcom about a young woman with a reputation for being difficult and mean, but who is really kind at heart. Doherty will play that woman’s bitchy friend.” TINA FEY ON SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE

”It’s a talking-dog movie. That movie looks so bad — I can’t believe I wasn’t in it.” B-LISTER BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT ABOUT KIDS’ FLICK GOOD BOY!, ON JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE

”Oh, I love singing. Oh, wait. They aren’t poor, are they?” WILL’S LES MISERABLES-HATING MOTHER (BLYTHE DANNER) ABOUT THE ABBA MUSICAL MAMMA MIA!, ON WILL & GRACE

”No, I’m not talking to you, Jenny. If I was, I would say Jenny.” LEE-ANN, UPBRAIDING JENNY, ON THE BACHELOR