1 CHEWING TOBACCO The smoking ban in NYC restaurants has got some of them using chaw as a spice. Patrons can now request that their salads be served in a spittoon.
2 THE APPRENTICE A reality show where Donald Trump fires an intern a week until one lands a job — and a really crappy boss.
3 MELISSA CARREY Jim’s first wife says $10,000 a month isn’t enough child support for their daughter. And it’s not — considering how expensive suing for more child support is these days.
4 RUSSELL CROWE He had a four-day wedding at his cattle ranch in Australia. Here’s hoping the marriage will last even longer!
5 ANGER MANAGEMENT A judge assigns Jack Nicholson to teach Adam Sandler how to control his temper. Jack wasn’t their first choice, but Robert Blake was a little tied up.
6 LUCKY A series about a Vegas gambler who can never seem to hold on to his winnings. The moral: Hell, the drinks are free!
7 PEARL JAM A report says dozens of people walked out when Eddie Vedder made an anti-Bush display at a recent concert. At that rate they’ll have no audience in a few hundred years.
8 CEOs GONE WILD The multimillionaire owner of the Girls Gone Wild video empire was busted for allegedly taping underage girls. Would he be involved in something sleazy like that?
9 HARVEY FIERSTEIN His drag-mom character in Broadway’s Hairspray is so popular that ABC is developing a sitcom for him as a matriarch. Coming sweeps week: Ozzie and Harveyette.
10 AMERICA’S MOST TALENTED KID It’s a surprise hit! Bonus: Most of them probably haven’t even been arrested yet.
Pavarotti, Bono do benefit for Iraqis May 27 . . . Toni Braxton
Pavarotti, Bono do benefit for Iraqis May 27 . . . Toni Braxton joins Broadway’s ‘Aida’ June 30