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S.A.T.'S for Rockers

Saliva’s Josey Scott, YOU HAVE 15 MINUTES…

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1. Fill in the blank: Saliva is to rap-metal as John Coltrane is to ______.

[A] deep-trance techno [B] a turkey sandwich [C] jazz

”I don’t consider us rap-metal. So I guess ‘turkey sandwich.”’

2. ”I rocked so hard I almost ______ my ______!”

(A) wet, pants [B] did, homework [C] lost, lunch

”Those are all f — -in’ awful, dude. None of the above.”

3. True or false: The human body produces a liter of saliva a day.

”False. I think it’s probably less. My whole family are medical professionals. I’m the black-sheep tattooed rocker of the bunch…. It’s true? Oh. Nice.”

4. What’s the [square root of] Korn?

”That their crew’s a bunch of a — holes. Did I say that? I don’t know. I got an F in ciphering [sic] numbers in high school.”

5. What do Rick Dees, Three 6 Mafia, and Saliva have in common?

”Memphis. Also Al Green, Otis Redding, Elvis Presley, Kathy Bates, Morgan Freeman…a bunch of ’em [have lived there].”

6. If Spider-Man = X, Saliva = Y, and Chad Kroeger = a lame guy from Canada, why did you do a duet with him on ”Hero”?

”Ooh. That’s mean. I guess because I had to give it up to Spidey.”