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It must have something to do with spending so much time on the San Andreas Fault. Although the double plagues of ”dehydration” and ”exhaustion” weren’t quite as prevalent in 2001, the past year still proved that many seemingly well-adjusted Hollywood movers and shakers weren’t quite the models of stability we thought they were.

ROBERT DOWNEY JR.

PROBLEM Cocaine

SIGNS OF DISTRESS First busted with the goods in Palm Springs; later arrested (in a Santa Monica alley) for suspected drug use.

ROUTE TO RECOVERY Malibu rehabberies Promises and Wavelinks International.

BEST ZINGER From Late Late Show’s Craig Kilborn: ”Robert Downey Jr. was arrested again for suspicion of being under the influence. It doesn’t look good. When Downey took his urine test, they found Darryl Strawberry floating in it.”

MARIAH CAREY

PROBLEM ”Extreme exhaustion”

SIGNS OF DISTRESS ”All I really want is to just be me,” she ranted on her website.

ROUTE TO RECOVERY After a brief stay at Silver Hill Hospital in Connecticut, she took a breather at the Bacara spa in Santa Barbara.

BEST ZINGER From Jay Leno: ”Mariah Carey says she believes there is an orchestrated conspiracy by a large number of people to keep her career and her record sales down. I think that’s called the public.”

BEN AFFLECK

PROBLEM Alcohol abuse

SIGNS OF DISTRESS Affleck went on a gambling weekend in Las Vegas, during which time he reportedly won $800,000 and dropped tips totaling $150,000.

ROUTE TO RECOVERY The $1,000-a-day Promises in Malibu (though he did find time to catch Planet of the Apes in Marina del Rey).

BEST ZINGER When Charlie Sheen is the guy driving you to rehab, who needs a punchline?

AARON SORKIN

PROBLEM Rock cocaine, pot, hallucinogenic ‘shrooms

SIGNS OF DISTRESS Packing the above on a flight to Las Vegas and getting busted.

ROUTE TO RECOVERY An undisclosed ”diversion program” — which involves counseling and drug tests on an outpatient basis — for first-time offenders.

BEST ZINGER From himself at an industry gala: ”When you feel stupid and embarrassed, facing a ballroom full of distinguished people in your industry is just what the doctor ordered.”

MATTHEW PERRY

PROBLEM Reportedly Vicodin, methadone, speed, and alcohol

SIGNS OF DISTRESS Leaving the Dallas set of Servicing Sara on a private jet (where he allegedly chain-smoked the entire trip) so his father could check him into rehab.

ROUTE TO RECOVERY Though he spent time at Minnesota’s Hazelden clinic, he opted for Marina del Rey’s Daniel Freeman Marina Hospital this time.

BEST ZINGER We wouldn’t dream of zinging the king of the zingers.

AJ MCLEAN

PROBLEM Alcohol abuse, anxiety, and depression

SIGNS OF DISTRESS According to fellow Backstreeter Kevin Richardson, ”He [was] burning the candle at both ends and partying quite a bit to escape it.”

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