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Sound Bites: The week's best TV quotes

TV’s funniest lines from the week of December 8, 2000

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”The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these jokes just write themselves.”
David Letterman on Late Show

”Today in Florida, thousands of ballots were driven from Palm Beach County all the way up to the state capitol in Tallahassee. You can tell it was a Florida driver because for the entire 450 miles, the truck had its right blinker on.”
Conan O’Brien on Late Night

”No, no, I deny that!”
Al Gore, asked if he’s in denial, on 60 Minutes

”Need I remind you I just lost a testicle? The absolute last place I want to be is a mosh pit.”
Cancer survivor Sean (Greg Grunberg), after girlfriend Meghan (Amanda Foreman) asked him to go clubbing, on Felicity

”I did what all men do on The View — I pretended to listen.”
Craig Kilborn, about his recent guest shot on ABC’s daytime talker, on The Late Late Show

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