Ann Limpert
July 28, 2000 AT 04:00 AM EDT

Movie sites

If you’re frustrated with the Hollywood plot factory that churns out one formulaic box office ”hit” after the next, you can corroborate your theories here, where film story lines are compacted down to a couple of lines to protect you from ”torture by bad movie.” Interestingly, Movie-a-Minute (part of the Rink Works entertainment site) doesn’t only deconstruct the good-bad (Wild Things: ”There is a plot twist. Then there is a plot twist…. The End. Then there is a plot twist…”), it also attacks the really good (All About Eve: People in showbiz turn MEAN”). B+

Despite a cracked-image design that’s slick but slightly muddled (much like the heads of some students), Sony’s official site for the upcoming collegiate romance by Amy Heckerling (Clueless) is way more outgoing than your average dork. It features such interactive goodies as a quiz (You: loser or hottie?), Loser-themed e-cards, and the chance to accumulate prizes and build your own dorm (name it, choose a design, and prioritize curfew strictness, food quality, and, of course, party time). You can also find info on the film (they’ve posted the production notes) and the cast (it features American Pie alumni Jason Biggs and Mena Suvari). But wait! They forgot to tell us how to be cool! Guys? B

The Coens
Known for hatching both exhilaratingly screwy comedies (Raising Arizona, The Big Lebowski) and sinister dramas (Blood Simple, Miller’s Crossing), the Coen brothers have spawned a devoted following that results here in a horridly designed (navy type on a black background render some links unreadable) buts surprisingly substantial fan site. You’ll find full scripts for selected Coen productions, extensive bios of the brothers and their ensemble players, and the kind of insider tidbits only someone who’s watched the films about 50 times each would know. Wow your friends when you tell them that the ”P.O.E.” and ”O.P.E.” bathroom graffiti in Raising Arizona are direct references to Dr. Strangelove. B
Log on to kittenish actress Melanie Griffith’s new official site (she calls it Avalon) and you’ll be greeted with an image of pure, delightful kitsch: the star looking down on a white-robed ”goddess” floating among Romanesque pillars and twinkling stars. Her breathy voice lulls you to sections like Essential Products (where she instructs you to put ketchup in your hair to ”get the green out”) and Create With Me (where she invites you to participate in an interactive journal). She even addresses those tabloid rumors about the state of her marriage to Antonio Banderas, as well as the state of his hair (”beautiful, thick, and natural”). The career section is oddly skimpy — at least compared with the archive of romance tips and fave recipes. Nonetheless, this site is camp of the highest power. A

Losman’s Lair of Horror
Slasher or suspense? Cannibals or cleavers? Dr. Butcher M.D. or I Spit on Your Grave? So many horror flicks, so few dark and stormy nights on which to watch them. Luckily, fright fiend Carlos G. Diaz has listed his favorites by genre (from Zombie Menace to Just Plain Vile), letting you tailor your chills to your taste. Diaz also gives advice on how to spot horror clichés (”If you have sex in the woods, you will die in the woods”) and how to pick out the killer. All you have to do is muster the courage to head to the video store. A-

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