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Fake celebrity philosophy

Fake celebrity philosophy — Metaphysical musings from Courtney Love, Brad Pitt, and others appear to be made up

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Who knew Brad Pitt was a scholar of Egyptian Gnosticism? Well, probably not Brad Pitt. The star’s philosophical musings appeared in an interview with journalist Tom Kummer in Germany’s upscale Suddeutsche Zeitung Magazin. Only problem is, Pitt’s publicist says the star never talked to Kummer. Ditto for a handful of other celebs credited with bizarre ramblings. The controversial Kummer — who was the subject of a May 15 expose in the newsweekly Focus — couldn’t be reached, but told Der Spiegel magazine: ”When I write, an implosion of the real begins.” (SZ has since apologized to readers.) Here, some of Kummer’s creations.
Additional reporting by Ursula Sautter

COURTNEY LOVE
”On the Riviera, there are seagulls which sip ice-cold gin and tonic…. Every third ice cube is filled with the brain matter of extinct American dinosaurs.”

BRAD PITT
”Only stupid people subject themselves to continual self-examination. Sometimes I’ve got something hanging out my nose for days but I don’t notice.”

SHARON STONE
”My personality sometimes resembles a really sleazy area of Los Angeles. And then reason tells me not to go there alone.”

NICOLAS CAGE
”Smoking is stupid, drinking is stupid, fighting over a woman is stupid. Yearnings are okay.”

PAMELA ANDERSON
(On Madonna) ”This woman makes me puke. She doesn’t know what she wants. She talks too much about feminism and sex, and I don’t like her music either.”

SEAN PENN
(On why he burns the palm of his hand with cigarettes) ”I’m an existentialist, sometimes life bores me…. Without pain nothing goes in my life.”

TOM HANKS
”There’s not much worth reporting in people’s heads. They prefer to invent something obviously ridiculous than say the truth. I’m like that as well.”

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