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James Bond: License to Surf

With a new 007 flick hitting theaters, the Web’s Bond fans are coming in from the cold.

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You blush and giggle like a schoolgirl at the names: Holly Goodhead, Xenia Onatopp, Cubby Broccoli. You entertain elaborate daydreams of swilling martinis, playing baccarat, and looking very, very good. You need a wristwatch that has X-ray features and a laser. No, really—you need a wristwatch that has X-ray features and a laser. You’re a James Bond fan, and there’s little to be done about it, no matter in which direction you think the franchise is going. In keeping with the Nov. 19 release of Bond installment No. 20, The World Is Not Enough, we bring you a smattering of smashing fan sites.

The 007 Express (geocities.com/~thunderball007) Oh, friends, webmaster Scott Mello knows how to create a chart. In a stunning display of organization, the Honolulu-based Mello has gone and listed everything you could ever want to know about Bond. That means fond reminiscences of henchmen past (Octopussy’s knife-throwing circus twins, Grischka and Mischka, for example) and how they met their obligatory doom (stabbing and a nasty cannon ”incident”). It also means budgets, box office reports, and Bond theme-song MP3s. Of course, you’ll never forgive yourself if you forget Yaphet Kotto’s birthday (Nov. 15), which you can find amongst dates for more than 100 other Bond fraternizers. Moneypenny would be quite pleased. A

The World is Not Enough — The Unofficial Site (www.netcomuk.co.uk/~bond 19) If you really, really must get a taste of MGM’s staid, corporate spin on TWINE, do it quickly at http://www.james bond.com/bond19. Bored? Uninspired? Ha. Now get the antidote: Webmaster Andrew William Hobson’s opinionated, occasionally cranky views. Sure, he’s a fan, but he’s got doubts, too, which he voices in a subtle, British way. On Bond’s X-ray sunglasses: ”A less original addition to the arsenal of gadgets.” On Denise Richards as a nuclear-weapons expert: ”Credibility may be strained somewhat.” But in the end, Hobson remains pro-Pierce Brosnan (”astounding”), Bond (”suave”), and the Babes (”sultry”). B+

Mr. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang! (www.ianfleming.org) The name’s more suited to a porn site than the official entry of the Ian Fleming Foundation, but it does have some hardcore coverage. Consider the making of…Bic’s Bond-themed lighter! Or the latest on…the BMW-Bond ad campaign! Still, if you’re a serious fan, some small, kind-of-creepy part of you will find all of this Need to Know material. So come on down for updates on our beloved Desmond ”Q” Llewelyn’s health, VCR alerts for Brosnan appearances—and a spirited analysis on whether 007 could really have fought in the Battle of the Bulge. Don’t you feel naughty? A-

Fandom — James Bond: 007 Forever (www.fandom.com/james_bond) An exhilarating blend of insider jokes (”Top 10 Signs That [dueling Bond scribe] Kevin McClory Has Hired a Bad Lawyer”), sheer enjoyment (best Bond lines), and stuff to buy (oh, Pussy Galore action figure—you will be mine). Michael ”Icebreaker” Kersey — whose page is hosted by sci-fi mega-site Fandom — gets James Bond. He knows you can have a fab pre-credit sequence (hello, Moonraker!) and still have a very un-fab movie (hellooooo, Moonraker!). He knows the best villains have idiosyncrasies (obsessive fondness for gold, obsessive fondling of kitties). And finally, he knows that martinis, casinos, and (above all) Bond Babes are just inherently cool. At last, a website to leave you shaken and stirred. A+