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Sound Bites: The week's best TV Quotes

TV’s funniest lines from June 11 to 17

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”The world’s oldest roller coaster, at Lakemont Park in Altoona, Pa., was put back in operation after a 14-year hiatus. Yeah, that’s the one thing I’m looking for in a roller coaster: seniority.”
Dennis Miller on Dennis Miller Live

”You had Death of a Salesman, The Iceman Cometh, Annie Get Your Gun — it was an incredible year for Broadway. Unfortunately, the year was 1949.”
David Letterman on Late Show

”He makes Alan Thicke look like Marlon Brando.”
Brad Garrett, playfully dissing cast mate Ray Romano’s acting ability, on E!’s Behind the Scenes: Everybody Loves Raymond

”I dress up like Sally Jessy Raphael at night.”
Jerry Springer, empathizing with a transvestite guest, on The Jerry Springer Show

”A 14-year-old girl won the national spelling bee, and today Dan Quayle named her as his running mate.”
Jay Leno on The Tonight Show