Entertainment Weekly

Stay Connected

Subscribe

Advertise With Us

Learn More

Skip to content

Article

''Seinfeld''s bit players

Posted on

As if the four core players didn’t annoy each other enough! Over the years, Jerry and Co. have had to contend with a roster of lovably hateable revolving characters, each of them champion button pushers in their own right. Some were stolen straight from life (George Steinbrenner, J. Peterman); others sprouted from the warped minds of the show’s creators. Sadly, we don’t have room to high-five the entire team (sorry, Babu), but here are the stats on some of our faves.

DAVID PUDDY

OCCUPATIONS Auto mechanic (the only honest one in New York); car dealer
PROFILE Lazy, dumb, squinting, staring, New Jersey Devils-loving, recovering germaphobe with Christian music on all his car presets
IRKED Elaine with all of the above and by painting his face for a hockey game, taking her to Arby’s one too many times, wearing a man-fur, and not caring that she’ll go to hell…and Jerry by stealing his ”move,” excessive high-fiving, and waffling on a Saab deal

MR.PITT

OCCUPATION Eccentric dilettante; Morgan Springs water board member
PROFILE Persnickety and oddly childish; forbids ink in his office (preferring pencils with the finest points); eats Snickers bars with cutlery; finds Woody Wood-pecker’s laugh ”intoxicating”; mesmerized by 3-D posters; friend of Jackie O.
IRKED Elaine with his fussy demands (picking salt off pretzels by hand, finding a ”decent sock”) and removing her from his will

CRAZY JOE DAVOLA

OCCUPATION Aspiring TV writer; psycho
PROFILE Chemically unbalanced; maniacally obsessed with opera (occasionally adopts the guise of doomed clown Pagliacci) and Elaine (to the point of building a shrine to her); sensitive to party slights; prone to quoting John Wilkes Booth (Sic semper tyrannis — Thus always to tyrants) during assassination attempts
IRKED Jerry, Kramer, and Elaine by stalking them and threatening them with violence

SUSAN ROSS

OCCUPATION Onetime NBC programming exec
PROFILE Intelligent, mature, with the patience of a saint (she lived with George); briefly experimented with lesbianism (”it didn’t take”); blessed with an early death after ingesting cheap envelope glue
IRKED George with her intelligence and maturity (and expecting the same of him), by challenging his driving prowess, agreeing to marry him, then, in death, screwing him out of millions

KENNY BANIA

OCCUPATION Cloying hack comedian
PROFILE Devotee of Mendy’s restaurant; over-bearingly generous; favors banal routines about Ovaltine and shopping carts with one bad wheel
IRKED Jerry by representing the basest of American taste in comedy, stringing him along for a free meal (in exchange for an unwanted Armani suit), capitalizing on his killer stand-up lead-ins, and dating one of his exes (”Tooth-brush in the toilet” Jenna)

POPPIE

OCCUPATION Owner of Poppie’s Restaurant
PROFILE Staunch anticommunist (his adored mother was killed by them in Greece); gastro-intestinal sufferer; makes a nice duck
IRKED Jerry by urinating on his new couch and serving him food after using the bathroom and not washing his hands…Elaine for his anti- abortion politics…and Kramer by his unyielding condiment fascism (he will not permit the lowly cucumber on the duo’s make-your-own pizzas)

Comments