As last fall’s theatrical rerelease of Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation showed — and its current video release confirms — even for newly minted stars, there’s no hiding from the horrors of one’s past. Matthew McConaughey and Renee Zellweger are the rising talents who caused 1995’s The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre to be re-titled and relaunched. Anyone interested in full disclosure was bound to be intrigued. But a better, fuller disclosure would be a compilation reel of all those other recent darlings who appeared in B movies they’d prefer to forget.
·Critters 3 (1991, New Line) reveals Leonardo DiCaprio at 16 looking barely pubescent, clubbing an intergalactic fur ball and taking Critter quill in the neck, proving he’s more than an ingenue with a romantic name.
·Leprechaun (1993, Vidmark) features baby-faced brunet Jennifer Aniston as a spoiled Angeleno named Tory who somehow manages to be perky and cute even when doing battle with the film’s demonic little person.
·Nightscare (1993, LIVE) parades an occasionally awkward Elizabeth Hurley as a scientist who turns a killer into a telepathic monster. Or is she just dazed from being yanked back and forth by the incoherent script?
·Return of the Killer Tomatoes (1988, Anchor Bay) sports a dark-haired George Clooney as the hero’s pal, who devotes more time to joking about product placement than combatting the comedic tomato menace.
·Tales From the Darkside: the Movie (1990, Paramount) has an icy Julianne Moore, who vamps and swindles brainy creep Steve Buscemi, not realizing that vamping and swindling will enrage an ancient mummy.
·Voodoo Dawn (1989, Academy) unearths grimy Gina Gershon as a sultry Deep South migrant worker who faces off against zombie terror and affects a Dixie drawl — when she manages to stay in character.