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Sound Bites

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”I could have a weekly show, The Ninny. Or [turning to fellow guest Tim Allen] I could do Homo Improvement with you.” ELTON JOHN, responding to Jay Leno’s suggestion that he do his own sitcom, on The Tonight Show

”Women. Can’t live with them. Can’t explain to the desk clerk why you only need one bed.” ELLEN (ELLEN DEGENERES) talking about being a lesbian on Ellen

”I guess she’s batted around, and she’s back at the top of the order.” JERRY (JERRY SEINFELD), about Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) dating an old boyfriend again, on Seinfeld

”Heard the latest about Michael [Jackson]? Apparently his wife, Debbie Rowe, is pregnant. Expecting a girl. Doctors say this could be the first time they’ve known the sex of the baby before they knew the sex of the father.” JAY LENO on The Tonight Show

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