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If they ran Hollywood...

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They say that absolute power corrupts absolutely. Let’s put it to the test. We asked an unscientifically selected group of movie folk what they’d do if given complete control over the industrial-entertainment complex. Their replies:

ROBIN WILLIAMS: ”Besides an open bar? Make a grip the head of a studio. And have all the electricians be script advisers.”

JODIE FOSTER: ”I’d make fewer movies. It’s important to make films that have real stories. And you can’t do that when you’re writing something in two weeks and shooting it a week later.”

JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT, star of I Know What You Did Last Summer: ”I’d tell everybody to stop making it all about money and names. I’ve lost so many parts because my name isn’t Claire Danes or Liv Tyler.”

SAMUEL L. JACKSON: ”I would make sure that the people who greenlight movies are artists and filmmakers, and not bean counters. They’re always trying to repeat something that’s already made money, rather than saying, Okay, this is a great story, let’s tell it.”

MEL GIBSON: ”I would star in everything.”

ALBERT BROOKS: ”I’d move it to Santa Fe. It’s a much better pace there and most movies made here could never exist in Santa Fe.”

MICHELLE PFEIFFER: ”I’d probably run it into the ground. I’d probably make movies nobody else wanted to see. I’m the last person to run Hollywood.”

JAMES ROBINSON, chairman/CEO, Morgan Creek: ”I’d have another 30 good young actors between age 20 and 40. Right now you’ve got about 200 films chasing the same six or seven guys. It’s like 180 men standing around a pond trying to catch one of seven fish.”

JASON PRIESTLEY: ”No more Lord of the Dance at any awards shows ever. And a limit on the number of films that Parker Posey can have at Sundance.”

CHRISTINA RICCI, 17: ”I would change this popular assumption that actors under the age of 15 don’t know what they’re doing. It makes me crazy. I’m like, I’ve been doing this for nine years.”

VIVICA A. FOX, star of Soul Food: ”Women would get to have the same outrageous salaries!”

DENIS LEARY: ”Jean-Claude Van Damme would be somebody’s driver — not mine — which I think is what he was originally. He could do splits between the front and back seat, he could wear underwear or not, I don’t care, but he’d be driving somebody.”

STEVEN SEAGAl: ”I’d try to have movies that lead people into contemplation, kindness, and compassion, and make films that make the world a better place.”

JANEANE GAROFALO: ”People would think taking the bus was a good thing.”

JENNIFER ANISTON: ”I’d demand honesty, from all ends, from the top top top to the bottom…. People say things because they want to please, and I think everyone would be much happier if people just said what was up.”

NATHAN LANE: ”I’m drunk with power just at the thought. We’d have an actor’s cut released on video where you got to see all the scenes I wanted.”

JILL HENNESSY, star of Most Wanted: ”I’d have the perception of beauty include people who aren’t that skinny and have more pigment than Uma Thurman.”

AARON ECKHART, star of In the Company of Men: ”Jeez, I’ve only been in Hollywood for 10 minutes. What would I change? The sheets.”

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