Entertainment Weekly

Stay Connected


Advertise With Us

Learn More

Skip to content
Oscars 2017
The Latest News and Insider UpdatesDon't Miss


Jerry's ''dear Jane'' excuses on ''Seinfeld''

Posted on

Although Elaine and George have capriciously dumped suitors (the latter, once, because of a girlfriend’s fondness for the phrase ”Happy, Pappy?”), Jerry is the King of the Idiosyncratic Heave-Ho — or at least the Passive-Aggressive Recoil. Herewith, the list so far; keep your eyes peeled for updates:

· For not laughing at all
· For laughing too strangely
· For having bad taste in commercials
· For having man hands
· For appearing to own only one dress
· For being too altruistic
· For not kissing on the third date
· For possibly having fake breasts
· For not giving him a massage
· For not tasting his pie
· For shushing him in front of the TV
· For suggesting he share her toothbrush
· For having been with (and getting dumped by!) Newman
· For being his soul mate
· For being liked by his parents
· For eating peas one at a time