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10 stupid questions for Norm MacDonald

The ”Saturday Night Live” actor gives his end-of-season thoughts

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Norm Macdonald is a little nervous. The comic is watching CNN cover the fifth anniversary of the Rodney King verdict from his L.A. hotel room when he realizes that another looting-crazed riot is due to break out. ”Those VCRs only last about five years,” he reasons. Well, at least the 34-year-old Canadian doesn’t have to fret about his career: His snide ”Weekend Update” segments and bizarre Bob Dole impressions were the highlight of this year’s moderately resurgent Saturday Night Live. Herewith, Macdonald’s end-of-season thoughts.

· What would you compare working at “SNL” to? I’d compare it to working in a coal mine every day. Except you only have to work on Saturdays for an hour…. I cut out early. I think it’s cool to watch the end of the show at home.

· What jokes were censored from this year’s Weekend Updates? They didn’t want to deal with Fred Goldman. I wanted to do all these jokes about his mustache. He’s such a sympathetic character, but at the same time he’s got this crazy mustache that makes you laugh. He looks like he should be tying a girl to the train tracks.

· On the April 12 Weekend Update you let the word f— slip out. What happened? That was weird. I just f—ing said it.

· What was the reaction from NBC? They were kind of mad. I had to phone them all and tell them I wouldn’t do it anymore…. I’m surprised it doesn’t happen all the time because that word is always on my mind. I find it’s an excellent word because that way you don’t need a large vocabulary.

· Didn’t Charles Rocket get kicked off SNL shortly after saying f—? His face swept through my mind for a moment. But then I couldn’t quite remember what his face looked like. And that worried me too.

· Do you read a lot of newspapers for inspiration? All I read really is sports and Marmaduke. That guy can’t catch a break, that Marmaduke!

· What are you doing over the summer? I’m trying to write a comedy album. The dirty stuff I can’t do on TV.

· What about writing a book? I don’t want to do that because I’d feel too bad. Every time I see someone like Carrot Top with a book on the f—ing New York Times best-seller list, I feel sorry for some guy at home trying to write an actual book.

· Are you going to volunteer this summer? Maybe I’ll be a volunteer fireman. That appeals to me for two reasons. The extreme danger and the complete lack of pay.

· What’s your favorite comedy phrase? Crack whore. Because there’s so much going on in that one phrase.

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