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Sound Bites

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”It’s great to come back here and see all the people I’ve avoided like the plague for the last few years while the show sucked.” — Tom Hanks, returning to host SNL

”My mother isn’t the answer to anything, unless the question is ‘Why does Lisa have her head in the oven?’ ” — Lisa (Lisa Ann Walter) on Life’s Work

”They come over here and steal our jobs — those Chunnel-digging, giant-rock-building, mad-cow-breeding, room-temperature-beer-drinking sconeheads!” — Drew (Drew Carey), after a Brit was hired as his boss, on The Drew Carey Show

”Okay, both you guys are in a bar…. Stop me if you’ve heard this one.” — Mayor Winston (Barry Bostwick), schmoozing with a rabbi and a priest, on Spin City