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Sound Bites

The funniest quotes on TV for the week of Dec. 22, 1005

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”There’s a hematoma on your neck.” — Dr. Benton (Eriq La Salle), to the hickey-afflicted Dr. Carter (Noah Wyle), on ER

”Let me give you a little quote: ‘He who lies to Munch gets his sorry ass kickethed.’ Bill Shakespeare.” — Det. Munch (Richard Belzer) to a poet/killer, on Homicide

”My newborn son, Will Siskel, is on a Tony Manero scholarship for the rest of his life.” — Gene Siskel, who bought John Travolta’s white Saturday Night Fever suit for $2,000 in 1979 and recently sold it for $145,500, on CBS This Morning

”I’m in the Superman suit every day. I’m getting so comfortable in it, I’m starting to worry about myself.” — Lois & Clark‘s Dean Cain on The Late Late Show