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Sound Bites: The Week's Best TV Quotes

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”I don’t know what all this talk is about, to be honest with you. Don’t forget, we were number one at the box office in Zaire.”
-Arnold Schwarzenegger, defending the performance of his non-blockbuster of last summer, Last Action Hero, on Late Show

”I really wanted to be an altar boy.”
-Julia Sweeney on the possible creative origins of the androgynous Pat character, on Later

[Anna Nicole Smith] married an 89-year-old guy who’s worth 500 million bucks. And today, Tom Arnold proposed to both of them.”
-Jay Leno, on The Tonight Show

”I was like, ‘WOW! I’m getting paid!’ ”
-Keanu Reeves on his reckless Speed driving, on The Tonight Show