October 29, 1993 at 04:00 AM EDT

And the only alternative for you is a Stephen King fantasy aboutthe hell of being a writer, reach for u Misery (1990, ColumbiaTriStar), in which an author (James Caan) is the captive guest of theworst hostess since Lady Macbeth (Kathy Bates). B+ If you’d actuallylike a movie about the mean creatures who play a big part in The DarkHalf, you can always try u The Birds (1963, MCA/Universal),Hitchcock’s meditation on how the harmless, once turned vicious, canbe horrifying. A+ If it’s a movie about schizophrenia you want, u TheThree Faces of Eve (1957, FoxVideo) is dependable. Good and bad girlswage war for prominence in Southern housewife Joanne Woodward’spersonality. B+

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