1 Malcolm X
At last, the story of the famous baseball-cap designer comes to the silver screen.
2 Macaulay Culkin
If interviewers made a trained seal slap its cheeks this often, they’d get a warning from the ASPCA.
3 Little Rock
Have you heard this one? What do you call a rusted-out 1947 Ford truck in Arkansas? A lawn ornament.
A chilling story of evil and the undead. Then after work, I went to see this movie.
5 Elton John
Time Warner gave him a $39 million advance. And a free subscription to the AARP Journal.
6 The White-Wine War
Who will be hurt if a $10 bottle of Chablis goes to $30? The kind of people who make $500 a day for $100 worth of work.
The classic tale of the genie who can grant three wishes. If Disney were really so cheap, they would have tried to cut it down to two.
8 Axl Rose
Two years’ probation for starting a riot in St. Louis. It was his first conviction. This year.
9 Fleetwood Mac
Clinton has made ”Don’t Stop” his unofficial theme song. Now they’re busy writing ”Hail to the Dude.”
10 Steven Seagal
Under Siege proves people have had enough of sex and violence. They just want violence.
11 Oprah’s engagement
Don’t worry, Stedman, not all married men turn into pod people.
12 Michael Jordan
The year’s highest-paid athlete made most of his money off court. Maybe he’s practicing to be a judge.
13 Phil Donahue’s 25th
A prime-time lesson on how to recycle your trash.
14 Michael Jackson’s cologne
15 Bon Jovi
It looks like they cut some hair when they chipped him out of that 1988 glacier.