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Fantasy video versions

From ”Star Wars” to ”Police Academy,” reedited film collections we’d like to see

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Fantasy video versions

Filmmakers have long been deeply influenced by Francis Ford Coppola. So, what if they took his cue and started reediting past productions as ”new” multi-tape home-video packages? We can only imagine the results:

*THE STAR WARS COLLECTION: In the reedited trilogy, the story is told in reverse, which is even more satisfying as it ends with the annoying Princess Leia back in the clutches of Darth Vader.

*NATIONAL LAMPOON’S VACATIONS: The five-hour, three-tape saga of the Griswald family’s holidays takes on an eerie tone when Mom and Dad pretend not to notice that their two children get replaced by others from trip to trip.

*LITTLE BIG DYSFUNCTIONAL MAN: The movies Midnight Cowboy, Rain Man, and Hero are combined, offering six hours of Dustin Hoffman playing virtually the same character.

*FROM BACK TO THE FUTURE — 1885 to 2015: In this strictly chronological resequencing of the three Robert Zemeckis-directed blockbusters, the fantastic travels and travails of Marty McFly and Doc Brown make even less sense than they did before.

*RETIRED POLICE ACADEMY: The best moments from all six Police Academy movies are compiled, giving us 10 minutes’ worth of credits and Michael Winslow’s mouth-produced sound effects.

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