It’s time for another report on the response to our postcards. The big winner lately (in quantity) is the ”Trash the Longbox” card (April 20), which has brought in 2,787 ecologically aware replies aimed at the Recording Industry Association of America. Everyone signed our postcard pledge to continue buying CDs after (and if) record companies eliminate the useless and wasteful longbox packaging. Eighty of the names came in on two spontaneously organized and collected petitions.
The postcard asking for a favorite TV commercial (March 30) inspired 386 responses, plugging for almost as many plugs. Only three ads attracted multiple fans: those Pepsi spots with Michael J. Fox, the Nike ads with Bo Jackson, and the Energizer Bunny bits.
In the next issue (April 6) we invited nominations for children’s books to be included in the ”Classics Shelf” of our Kids section. The most popular were Winnie-the-Pooh, Curious George, Pippi Longstocking, The Velveteen Rabbit, James and the Giant Peach, Where the Wild Things Are, Harold and the Purple Crayon, Harriet the Spy, The Wizard of Oz, Stuart Little, Black Beauty, Peter Rabbit, Goodnight Moon, and anything by Dr. Seuss.
The following week, the postcard requested a joke for Jay Leno (April 13); we promised to publish the ones that made us laugh. Well, 444 cards later, we’re still waiting. But seriously, a few were funny: ”What does Dan Quayle say when his wife, Marilyn, blows in his ear? Thanks for the refill, honey.”
When we asked what sportscaster Brent Musburger should do between jobs (April 27), 447 counselors and fans answered. These suggestions were so good that they were included in the feature on Brent last week. Two more have come in since: ”Team up with Andy Rooney and remake all the Abbott and Costello movies in color” and ”Get a job singing John Denver songs at a pancake house in Alaska.”
And then there was thirtysomething (May 4). We asked which character you’d most want to be like and which you have nightmares about becoming. Out of 245 responses, the character most admired was ”free spirit” Melissa. Least liked was Elliot, described as ”a redheaded weasel,” and ”an immature whining idiot who makes me throw things at my TV.” Hope was popular for the simple reason that she gets to sleep with Michael: ”Oh Swoon!” gushed one card. But not everyone wanted to become like Hope. One opinionated reader fretted: ”All her clothes are from the ’60s and she’s flat.” Only one reader wrote to say he wanted to be Gary, because ”the guy is a chick magnet, and I can relate to that.” Of course, several of thirtysomething‘s detractors revealed different feelings for the characters: ”Nuke them all!”
Finally, we got around to the big question: ”Who Killed Laura Palmer?” (May 11). We received 291 accusations from true students of Twin Peaks. Leo was picked by 42 watchers. Laura’s father was the surprising second choice. Other damn-fine-coffee nuts decided there was a Laura-Cousin Maddy switch and that Laura still lives, at Maddy’s expense. Our favorite suggested murderers were those that Lynch himself would find bizarre. For some, patch-eyed Nadine was a certain perpetrator with simple motives: ”Laura had two good eyes,” and ”Laura wouldn’t tell her where the drapery department was at Horne’s store.” Then there were those morbidly imaginative folks who thought Waldo the mynah bird had to be guilty: ”Laura refused his advances, so he pecked her to death.” A finger was even pointed at faceless Diane for an unarguably good reason: ”I think she’d do anything to get Agent Cooper out of the office and as far away from her as possible. He must drive her nuts!”